Friday, September 12, 2008

No Rodents?? How Can This Be??

I'm always amazed when someone says they don't have squirrels or chipmunks in their yard. How can you not have these pesky little rodents? If you even have just one plant in your yard, you should have something digging it up.

One of my sisters lives in West Virginia and has told me she doesn't have any squirrels or chipmunks running around. This is West Virginia, with all it's mountains and forests for petes' sake!! She has lots of trees and flower beds but has never seen one of these trouble makers in her yard. She does live right next to a large river and the other side is a huge wooded area, so maybe they all decided to stay on that side. But I know that even if I lived next to a roaring, raging, river with rapids, those little devils would have learned how to build a raft and I would have them in my yard in no time, digging up my garden.

And make no mistake about it, chipmunks are just as bad as their larger cousins. They might be a lot smaller but they have all the same bad habits. The only thing different about chipmunks is that they don't build their nests in trees. They much prefer your shed. They will flatten their bodies enough to squeeze through that 1/2 inch opening under the door, bring in their food stash and set up housekeeping next to your garden supplies. And when you open that door to get to your pruning shears, they delight in scaring the bejeezes out of you by scurrying right past your hand. You can hear them snickering in the corner when you let out a loud yelp.

And they build tunnels. While sweeping off my front stoop one day, one ran right past me and into my mass of four o'clocks. I decided to give chase, broom in hand, thinking I'd sweep him right out of my yard. Got that picture in your mind? The neighbor who happened to be walking down the sidewalk did. Anyhow, I searched all through the plants and couldn't find him anywhere. Then I noticed a small hole in the ground. I immediately stuck a nearby rock in the hole and thought "Okay, I got you now". But then I saw him emerge from another hole farther down and race away. I thought about continuing the chase but since the neighbor was now standing still, staring at me intently, I decided to give up the pursuit, gave her a small wave, (hopefully not with the hand holding the broom) and went back into the house.

So, for any of you out there who feel you are missing out on all this fun, and would like to have some of these sweet little critters in and around your yard, let me know. I'll be glad to FedX some by overnight express and you can be having a great time in no time.


TC said...

OMG! Ha! Ha! Ha! Hee! Hee! Ummm, sorry, I didn't mean to laugh FD. And I can sure empathize with you. Two years ago I dispatched over 15 whistle pigs that had tried to invade my garden. This year's count is 7 so I think my method is working.

Dog_geek said...

I think that I've only ever seen one squirrel in our "yard" although we have a ton of them in the woods down by the back field (what we have named "Squirrel Hollow"). The dogs just love when we walk through Squirrel Hollow. Chipmunks are another story - they really did a number on one of my flower beds last year, and cost us more than one new drain pipe, when the dogs tore them up going after the little critters.

And the little crazed broom- weilding episode... let's just say that there have been many times that I have been very glad to not have many neighbors.

beckie said...

Loved this post! Images leaped to mind of rafting squirrels, chipmonks yelling 'boo' and doing belly laughs at your expense. I really shouldn't laugh as I have squirrels but theu don't do any damage to my gardens. I should and do consider myself fortunate. If you get any takers on shipping, try UPS-they might be cheaper. :)

flydragon said...

Glad you got a chuckle out of that. Or was that a snicker? Never heard of whistle pigs so looked it up and found out they're groundhogs/woodchucks. After comparing my small rodents to your large ones, I decided if I had to put up with any, I'll put up with mine.

I've seen chipmunks chew through wood, tape, wires and everything else to get to where they want to go. And they are persistent!!! Tape it back up, they'll chew it off again, and again, and again.
And I'm sooo glad my neighbors don't walk around with cameras.

I have no doubt those crafty little buggers could get across that river if I lived there.

One of my kids works for fedx so I thought maybe she could get me a discount, especially if I start sending in bulk. I'm sure there are going to be a lot of people out there that will want some of these for pets.

Susie said...

I think I'm going to pass on having all that fun!!! haha

Okay, I'm cracking up reading those comments especially the one from Beckie!

If it does make you feel any better we have little field mice that try to make their home in our home, that is when the weather starts to cool. I think I had rather have the chipmunk family!

Muddy Boot Dreams said...

I understand! Believe me.....
They have set the burgular alarms off at the nursery more than once, resulting in 3 am phone calls to us.
And if someone in my building doesn't stop feeding them peanuts!!!! I don't know what I am going to do. I have so many peanuts in my planters that I am going nuts.
Next to the crows and the seagulls, the squirrels are the worst.

Not Very Anonymous Mom said...

i'm back, and catching up on your posts. you are a great storyteller, i especially liked the train post. looking forward to the next post! i'll call you later, it is saturday after all.

flydragon said...

Are you sure you don't want me to send some down to you? Anybody having a birthday who needs a gift? They make great pests, I mean pets.
I had a little mouse under my kitchen sink one year so I set a mouse trap. I don't know how he got in, but I do know how he got out.

The guy behind me also puts out peanuts. (I could choke him) Whenever I see one of those rodents climbing over the fence, peanut in mouth, to bury it in my yard, I yell "Hey you got it over there, now bury it over there" But they pretend they've suddenly gone deaf and totally ignore me.

Welcome back. You never had the opportunity to ride on the train, did you? Talk later about your trip.

Shady Gardener said...

Yes, and if your demand exceeds your ability to supply, let me know! We've been "live trapping" striped gophers lately!!! ;-)

flydragon said...

I haven't received any orders yet, but once they start rolling in and I run out of stock, I'll be glad to send them your way. Striped gophers should be in demand too.

Anonymous said...

We don't have any squirrels or chipmunks bothering us here. You want to know the secret? We live in a new neighborhood with little baby trees! I'll know our sub has grown up when I start seeing them here!

flydragon said...

Hi Msrobin,
My first customer. How many would you like? You won't want the squirrels since you don't have the trees that they like, but I checked out your blog and the chipmunks would just love living there!!!! And if you're not into chipmunks, Shady has some striped gophers that she's willing to part with. I don't know what they look like, but don't they sound cute??